I'm Coming Out

So my Dad came to visit about a month ago. We had a blast! We went to a play, hiked in Moab, went out to dinner, and just talked. I realized it was the first time I had gone out in 6 months. I had forgotten how much I enjoy getting out of the house, hitting the town and socializing with someone other than the characters in my latest novel. So, I decided to start getting out there. I thought hanging out in a group would be a good start. My friend asked me to go out dancing in Salt Lake. I was hesitant at first, but I finally agreed. The day of the event came and I was ready. I had skinny jeans that actually made me look skinny, high heels that made my legs look miles long and didn't hurt my feet. My hair was tousled, I mastered the smokey eye without looking like a raccoon, and my lips looked voluptuous in red lip gloss. Yeah, I looked pretty hot. I opened the door to the club and the breeze wafted my hair just like one of those Victoria Secret models at a runway show. The song "I'm coming out (I want the world to know. I'm going to let it show)" sounded in the background and everyone turned to see who this new vixen could be. The hottest guy in the club came up to me and said "Hey, you wanna dance," and I said, "Sure (in a breathy, seductive voice)....but just so you know, I'm divorced. I don't know if you are okay with that. I mean you can take back the invitation if you want." The music cut and I woke up in my pajamas and with a head cold. Needless to say, I did not join my friend dancing that night. I stayed at home and spent some good quality time with Tylenol Cold and Sinus. I am happy to report my real "coming out" was much less dramatic and embarrassing than whatever happened in my sub conscience!